Once there was a woman went out to pick beans,
and she found a Hairy Toe.
She took the hairy toe home with her,
and that night, when she went to bed,
the wind began to moan and groan.
Away off in the distance
she seemed to hear a voice crying,
‘Where’s my hair-r-y to-o-oe?
Who’s got my hair-r-y to-o-oe?’

The woman scrooched down,
way down under the covers,
and about that time
the wind appeared to hit the house

Swoosh!

And the old house creaked and cracked
like something was trying to get in.
The voice had come nearer,
almost at the door now,
and it said
‘Where’s my hair-r-y to-o-oe?
Who’s got my hair-r-y to-o-oe?’

The woman scrooched further down under
the covers
and pulled them tight around her head.
The wind growled around the house like some
big animal
and r-r-rum-mbled down the chimney.

All at once she heard the door cr-r-eak,
and something slipped in
and began to creep over the floor

The floor went
cr-e-eak, cre-eak
at every step that thing took towards her bed.
The woman could almost feel
it bending over her bed.
Then, in an awful voice, it said:
‘Where’s my hairy toe?
Who’s got my hairy toe?

You’ve got it!’


Funny Poems for Kids - Funny, crazy and silly poems for the classroom, home or wherever you please

Algy met a bear,
The bear met Algy.
The bear grew bulgy –
The bulge was algy


Funny Poems for Kids - Funny, crazy and silly poems for the classroom, home or wherever you please

Under the spreading gooseberry bush
The village burglar lies;
The burglar is a hairy man
With whiskers round his eyes.

He goes to church on Sundays;
He hears the Parson shout;
He puts a penny in the plate
And takes a shilling out


Funny Poems for Kids - Funny, crazy and silly poems for the classroom, home or wherever you please

Order in the court
The judge is eating beans
His wife is in the bathtub
Shooting submarines

Funny Poems for Kids - Funny, crazy and silly poems for the classroom, home or wherever you please

The King said to Salome,
‘We’ll have no dancing here!’
Salome said, ‘The heck with you!’
And kicked the chandelier


Funny Poems for Kids - Funny, crazy and silly poems for the classroom, home or wherever you please